#huhh i need to go touch some grass

[kreepja]

My jujutsu kaisen's brain rot is becoming so serious it's not even a joke anymore.

[linksthoughtbrambles]

Precipitory

A short story for Zelink Week 2022's 'Rainy Days' prompt (see end for notes).

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Zelda’s grumbling stomach takes a sudden and unexpected backseat to a newfound sense of mischief.  “Oh, Link?”

“Yeah?” he asks, clearly suspecting nothing.

“…Race you!”

Zelda kicks off the damp ground, bounding like a mountain doe, an irresistible grin splitting her face wide at the sound of his surprised "AH!"  She hears his feet scramble to accelerate on the wet grass and wills her legs to fly her forward faster than she’s ever run.

His footsteps pound harder, so she fights to lengthen her stride to absolute maximum, the as-yet misty rain frosting her face in a pleasant chill, a contrast to the effort-induced heat quickly building beneath her fitted coat.  She makes a bee-line for the entrance to the first gatehouse, reaching it far more quickly than she’d have thought, startling a bewildered soldier carrying two trestle-table legs into stumbling back against the wall.  Link’s footsteps hit stone only a few seconds after hers.

“HI, MIPHA!” he shouts, and he’s made a tactical error, for he has distracted himself with his own politeness.

Mipha’s “Oh my!” and fumbled table-leg hardly register as Zelda slows the barest fraction, allowing Link to dog her heels toward the gatehouse’s exit.  He moves to pass on her right…

And she swerves.

Link, of course, being her appointed knight, and a perfect gentlemen, and more than a little bit silly, winds up hitting the wall with an uncomfortable-sounding array of cloth-and-boot-scraping and a vocalization somewhere between a grunt and a swiftly tamped swear.

Zelda giggles.

She hears him recover behind her, a few more hard steps on gatehouse stones followed by long, loud strides as he strives to catch up—and he is catching up!

“No, you don’t, knight!” she yells, the childish joy in her voice rendering it novel in her ears.

“Yes, I do, Princess!”  Link returns, his voice closer with each word.

The food table is so near—she need only touch it—there it is—his footsteps closing—one stride—no, half a stride—astride her--!!!!

With a great effort born of a competitive spirit she’d been unaware of (and a desire to see the Look On Link’s Face should she win), she leaps and slaps the table with her fingertips up to her longest fingers’ smallest knuckles.

“I- hehhh- win!” Zelda declares, tilting her chin at him haughtily as she never has before.

His jaw drops as they both pant (and she very much likes the sounds he makes as he does so).  His face has never quite adopted this expression in her presence—both appalled and amused—and she likes that, too.  “Princess! I’m- huhh- scandalized. Huhh. That was clearly a tie. Which means I won because you started unfairly without counting.”

She had done that, hadn’t she? She’s still panting, but the source of her breathlessness becomes debatable.  (Perhaps more precisely, it will be up for debate among the soldiers later in the mess, since several standing around the lunch table are attempting to eye them with unpracticed discretion).  Shortly, in Zelda’s own mind, a clear inner-debate-victor emerges.  She’s panting because Link is panting, and she would very much like him to pant in her ear like that while she presses him against the wall with a leg hooked around his hip.

“My hand touched the table an instant before yours,” she manages, simultaneously attempting to find reason somewhere within herself (difficult when imagining the taste of the mist mixed with the salt just below his jawbone).

“Ohhh, so it was a table-touching race, was it?” he challenges.  His hands go to those slender hips of his, a stance he’s never adopted in her presence before.  Perhaps he’s feeling more confident—or perhaps her thoughts of his hips had somehow reached him. 

Perhaps she should remember to continue the conversation.  “What else would we base it on?”

It appears—that silly, lopsided smile on his face that’s all hers.  “Well, I don’t know, maybe we could’ve set some rules so you couldn’t arbitrarily decide you won at the end-“

“It was not arbitrary,” she interrupts, her chin raising even higher along with her eyebrows.  “We were racing to lunch. The first table was clearly our destination.”

He huffs a laugh.  “Fine, Princess.”  His chin and eyebrows mock hers, with a faux-haughty rise and faux-royal eyebrow she bets he’s unaware of.  “But only because you’re the Princess.”

She doubts he’s cognizant of the sass-like head waggle he’s just done, either.  “How unfair. I didn’t pull rank on you.”

“It was implied,” and he says so with a step forward and a lurch of her pulse.

“I implied nothing of the sort,” she says, her even voice surprising (but pleasing) her. “I simply came to the logical conclusion that the table was our mutual goal.”

He snorts.  “Alright, Princess,” he says, his eyes somehow bluer and her skin thrumming at how they flit between her own. “Next time, we’re setting ground rules beforehand and counting to start and I’ll do the counting.”

She feels herself pulling taller—rising quite literally to the challenge, perhaps.  “Why should you?”

“Because you’re tricky,” and he says so with a twitch of his lips she wants to suck directly into her mouth.

“Is that so? I imagine I could still find a way to trick you, should you count,” she says with a smirk she doesn’t even try to moderate.

And Link—dear Goddess, Link—his silly smile burns for a moment, and Zelda isn’t sure if the flame lights in his eyes or his lips or the way he pulls himself just barely tall enough so his eyes may peer down into hers with shockingly evident purpose; only the fact of their presence in the open bailey, with soldiers less than fifteen feet from them, prevents her from acting on it.

She will act on it, soon, for if she doesn’t she’ll suffer some sort of horrific lapse in reason which will lead to a host of new social dilemmas, but she’ll find someplace out of sight to do so.

Her knight breaks the tension by reaching for a slice of bread, and it’s as though the sky itself has been watching them with bated breath, for it opens up.  What had been mist, and then a gentle pitter-patter, accelerates, droplets fattening and striking a beat on the coffee urns.  Link shoves his entire bread-slice into his mouth (which he often does regardless, but which saves his current lunch from becoming sodden while he rescues the remainder, replacing the lid once she retrieves a slice for herself).

Zelda supposes she ought to be at least slightly pragmatic and discuss the remaining stall placements for the festival. She does so, taking dainty bites, and regretting those as the bread dampens despite her other hand tented above it.  Her smirk returns as she notes his eyes on her mouth, though he follows her matter-of-fact-planning conversation with suggestions of his own.

Zelda decides his composure means she ought to give his eyes something more interesting to take in. She pointedly opens her lips as wide as possible and shoves the remainder of her bread in (no small feat—she’d taken quite a large piece), and watches with intense satisfaction as Link’s jaw hangs open in a vague purgatory (it sets him paling for a moment).

Once she swallows (still smirking), she says, "Back to it, then?"--and her thorough enjoyment of his reaction permeates her voice, its resulting brightness belying the rainy day and how it already threatens to plaster her hair to her scalp, face, neck, and coat.

He’s still staring at her mouth.  “…Almost.  Coffee first?”

“Ah.  Yes, that’s a good idea,” she admits, struck a bit sad at the realization that they’ll soon have no excuse to stand here and bait each other.  “Quickly, though, or it shall taste of rainwater.”

Link snags two cups, adds cream to hers and half as much to his, and fills both to the top with one arm above them in an attempt to preserve their palatability.  Zelda’s hands join his, and they stand quite a bit nearer to each other than they ought to, ostensibly drinking their afternoon fuel with haste against the rain, but actually stealing looks at each other’s faces—a chin here, a set of sipping lips there, and at one point, a clear look up one of Link’s nostrils when he examines the eastward clouds (which would reach them soon).

She thinks it says much regarding her feelings for her knight that she finds even his nose-hairs worthy of investigation.

She returns her cup to the table alongside other empties with a soft sigh.  They’ve no more excuse—back to work—but she’ll find her moment.  She will kiss him at least once more this day, or may Hylia re-make her as a golden-topped turnip.

Hours and hours later, Zelda leads Link with quick-moving words to match her speeding feet as they cross to the curtain wall south of the second gatehouse, and the instant she passes the threshold of the (mercifully) deserted guard tower at the end, she yanks him in by his shirtfront, her lips on his a soft contradiction, a concession to their need for stealth, and she nearly chokes with longing when he opens his own to deepen their hurried kiss, for they have no time—even a minute spent sequestered here would be suspicious—and she re-positions her mouth at his ear, so quiet.

“No time, Link, but I wanted you to know… I’ve been thinking of you all day.”

She places one sweet-suctioned kiss to the center of his jawline and walks back out into the still-drizzling rain.  She feels his eyes on her as his boots squeak on the soaked grass a moment later. 

It isn’t enough.  They need more than these few instants of closeness.  They need another rainy day—one with no festival to prepare for—one when they can remain inside, and reasonably so, to escape the precipitation.  One when she could curl up in that chaise near her fireplace, and perhaps call Link inside to help her move it nearer the hearth—when she could touch his wrist as he reaches for it, lighting a new fire under his skin instead—when he could rest one knee between hers and lean into her, that silly smile of his burning again just before his lips ignite her—when cold rain means more warmth rather than less.

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[Note: This fic is part of the Adventure Log+ AU, partially overlapping a chapter of Link's Thought Brambles but from a different POV.]

[Note: Google doesn't think 'precipitory' is a word. For the purpose of this story, it's an adjective describing something that causes or hastens an event (or that appears to--something right on the precipice of an event). And then there's the precipitation thing.]

Here's my Zelink Week 2022 fic post list.

Here's my fic masterlist.

@zelinkweekofficial

[hurt-care]

It’s spring and therefore I’ve become a complete pollen allergy slut this week. Please enjoy this incredibly gratuitous little OC fic about an anniversary celebration ;)

M, allergies. Definitely 18+

-

“Where are we going?” Kayleigh asked, playfully tugging her boyfriend's hand.

“If I told you, then it wouldn't be a surprise,” Isaac said.

“But what should I wear? Do I need to bring anything?”

“Wear that blue sundress,” he said. “I have everything else packed.”

Kayleigh raised her eyebrow.

“Alright,” she said. “If you insist.”

“We're leaving in ten,” Isaac replied. “I'm going to go put some stuff into the car.”

When Kayleigh arrived in the driveway a short while later, Isaac was sitting in the front seat with the windows up and his sunglasses on. She climbed into the passenger side and leaned over to kiss him.

“Okay, you,” she said. “Let's go on this adventure.”

“I made us a playlist,” he said, plugging his phone in. “It's a bit of a drive.”

He started up the first track, a song they both loved. And with that, he headed off towards the highway, taking the ramp onto the interstate and driving out of their town.

Kayleigh watched as they passed by forests outside, the bright spring sunshine making dappled patterns through the branches. They turned off the highway and went down a rural road, dipping along hills and passing by fields until they took a side road into the forest.

The road turned into a dirt path as they went deeper into the woods.

“Where the hell are we going?” she asked.

“Almost there,” Isaac said with a grin.

They merged onto another dirt road and down into a clearing where a field extended into the distance. Isaac pulled over and put the car in park.

“We're here,” he said. “I have a picnic packed in the trunk and a bottle of wine. Happy anniversary, babe.”

Kayleigh grinned.

“Aww! This is gorgeous. You're so sweet.”

She climbed out of the car and helped Isaac gather a blanket and a tote bag from the trunk.

“Why so far out here for a picnic?” she asked.

“I wanted to be sure we'd be alone,” he said, giving her hand a squeeze.

“I'm pretty sure no one will find us here,” she agreed.

They spread the blanket on the grass amidst a few sprays of wildflowers. In the distance, the field grew longer and dotted with larger patches of goldenrod and Bermuda grass.

Issac retrieved the bottle of wine from the bag and opened it, pouring them each a glass.

“To us, love,” he said, raising it. Kayleigh clinked hers against it with a smile.

“To us.”

They drank together and poured another round. Isaac pulled a loaf of bread and some cheese from the bag, setting it out along with a bag of grapes.

Kayleigh grabbed a bunch of the grapes and held them up playfully.

“Your highness,” she said, dangling them in front of Isaac's mouth. He started to lean in to bite one, but then hesitated. Behind his sunglasses, his brows furrowed and he dropped his mouth open, sucking in a sharp breath.

Ehh-TSCHH!

He sneezed sharply into the crook of his arm.

Kayleigh bit her lip and tried not to grin. Isaac was well aware of her kink for sneezing. He occasionally indulged it and sometimes his allergy symptoms would get bad enough to break through his daily medication and Kayleigh would try not to pounce on him too eagerly.

“Bless you,” she said softly, continuing to dangle the grapes in front of him. He sniffled lightly and then leaned in, taking one with his teeth.

“Thanks, love.”

He bit down on the grape and took the rest of the bunch, tossing one playfully towards Kayleigh's mouth. She missed and teetered backwards, laughing.

Hurhh-TSCHHHT!

Isaac sneezed again, tucking his nose into his shoulder.

“Bless you!” Kayleigh said. “Maybe a field wasn't the best idea for a date spot. I don't think your medicine can manage all this pollen.”

Huhh-TSCHGHH!

He bobbed forward again, exploding with another ticklish sneeze. And then, he reached up and lowered his sunglasses to reveal two very red, watery eyes.

“Who says I took my allergy medication today?” he said with a sniffle.

Kayleigh felt a rush of butterflies glowing hot in her stomach.

“What?” she said softly.

“I said, who says I took my medicine today?” he asked, leaning in and kissing her. She felt the damp edge of his nose against her cheek and she moaned into his mouth, deepening the kiss.

“Oh my god,” she said as they broke apart. “Are you insane?”

“Maybe?” he admitted with a chuckle, rubbing at his itchy eyes. “Doesn't matter. You'll have to drive home, FYI. I won't be able to see, the way this is going.”

Kayleigh bit her lip again, feeling herself flushing red.

“Is this really happening?” she began to say but Isaac interrupted her with a sudden fit of sneezes.

Ehh-TSCHHT! Ehhhh....hehh-TSCH! 'TSCHH! Ehh..heh-TSSCHGH!

Kayleigh watched in awe as he shuddered with each ticklish sneeze.

He finished the fit and looked at her with red, watering eyes and a nose that was starting to go pink around the edges. He sniffled and ran his wrist along the underside of his nostrils, stemming the steady drip for a moment.

“I can't believe you find this attractive,” he croaked with a smile.

“You have no idea,” she murmured.

“I do,” he replied. He moved towards her and leaned in, sweeping the curtain of her hair aside and trailing kisses down her neck. As he did, she felt his breath rush in and he sneezed gently against her skin.

Ngh-GHXT!

Kayleigh put her arms around him, pulling him close. He nibbled along the sensitive skin of her throat and down her collarbone.

“I picked this spot for a reason,” he said between kisses. Gently, he pushed aside the straps of her sundress and tugged it down, revealing her breasts. He kissed the skin where they rose above her balconette bra.

“Oh my god,” she moaned. “Isaac, you're crazy.”

He buried his nose between her breasts and rubbed it there as his fingertips massaged her nipples. She felt her hips begin to pulse in response. Soon, he was sniffling madly and she was afraid he'd pull back. She put her hand on the back of his head and he sneezed into her chest with a desperate, itchy explosion.

Ehh-tscGHHT! Ngh'TSCHH!

Kayleigh took a deep breath and reached down under her sundress to touch herself.

“No,” Isaac said, noticing her hand. “Let me.”

He lowered his head and pushed up her dress, pulling down her underwear.

“Lie down,” he instructed in a congested voice. Kayleigh didn't need to be told twice. She spread her legs, already slick and ready. He tasted her and gently nudged the rise of her with his nose. She moaned loudly, eager for more.

“I'm going to....tehhh...”

“Yes,” she pleaded.

He raised his head a little and sneezed across her stomach.

Hurhh-TSCHHHH!

“Ugh, it's so itchy,” he groaned, rubbing his nose in a circle against her hip. He lowered his face again and gave her a long, forceful kiss there, sucking and swirling his tongue. She cried out with eagerness.

“Isaac,” she moaned. “Please.”

His nose was swollen and streaming down, as were his eyes. He looked up at her from between her legs and grinned.

“Okay,” he croaked. He pulled at his belt and pushed his trousers down. He guided himself into her and pulled her upwards, so they sat straddled together. She pumped and ground her hips into him with vigour.

“It's so itchy,” he moaned into her ear. “I...hehh...”

His breath hitched but nothing happened.

“Babe,” he pleaded, breath catching again but no sneeze coming. She ran a finger along his swollen nose but that did nothing. And then she plucked a blade of grass and carefully ran it along his dampened nostrils, inserting it slowly.

The effect was almost instant. He took a rapid, shuddering breath and began to fit.

Hehh-NGHTHH! Nghh-TSCHH! TSCHHH!

Kayleigh was grinding madly, crying out.

Ehh-TSCHHH! Heh-TSCHGH! Tsh-GHXT!

Stars exploded in Kayleigh's vision and she moaned so loudly that it almost echoed in the cleaning.

Ehh—heh-TSCHH!

Isaac's nose ran freely down his lip and his face looked painfully red and swollen and damp with tears and snot.

“Please,” Kayleigh cried, thrusting faster.

He lowered his face into her neck and trailed his damp nose along her skin.

Ehh-tshSCHHT!

A sneeze exploded fully across her skin and she went rigid, pulsing with orgasm. Issac fished in the bag for some tissues he'd packed as she rolled off him, panting and boneless with pleasure.

He blew his nose with a gurgling sound, so congested now that he flooded the tissue easily and moved on to another. It's several seconds before he was satisfied and he stopped, balling up the Kleenex for future disposal.

In the outside pocket of the bag was a bottle of water and his allergy pills, which he retrieved and took a double dose of. The last thing he wanted is for Kayleigh to distractedly run them off the road while he sneezed the whole way home.

“You're amazing,” said a voice and Kayleigh was looking up at him through half-closed eyes. “Can I finish you off?”

He glanced down at his erection, still hard and pulsing.

“Please.”

She rolled over leisurely and pushed herself up onto her knees. Leaning over, she took him in her mouth with practiced movements, licking and sucking along his length. He tilted his head back, battling between the post-nasal drip trickling down his throat and the pleasure coursing this his body.

Hurh-tSCHH!

He sneezed into the spring air, mist mixing with pollen hanging heavy in the sunlight. He felt Kayleigh shudder with pleasure at just the sound and he in turn pulsed towards her mouth, hips writhing.

The orgasm came hard and fast and soon he was limp on the picnic blanket, snuffling and wheezing as the relaxing sensations flowed through him. Kayleigh took his head into her lap and gently wiped his nose with a tissue.

“You are a treasure,” she said, leaning over to kiss him. “Honestly, I can't...”

“I'm gonna...” he stuttered. “Tissue...!”

She pinched his nose with the Kleenex and he stifled several rapid sneezes into it.

Nght! Eh-TXHT! Ngh'XHT! TXHT!

She wriggled his nose gently between her fingertips, trying to relieve the itch.

Ngh'XHT!

He reached up and took the tissue from her, releasing her pinch of his nostrils and sneezing freely.

Ehh-tshGHHHH! Ngh'TSGHHH!

“Oh my god, sweetheart,” she exclaimed, still incredibly aroused but also sympathetic to his misery.

He blew his nose with a sharp, gurgling noise and sighed.

“The allergy medicine will kick in soon, I think,” he croaked.

“I know. You're so sweet,” she said, stroking back his hair. “I can't believe you did this.”

He sniffled and smiled up at her.

“It'll be a while longer,” he said huskily. “We can go for round two.”

She shivered involuntarily.

“You're joking.”

“I didn't go through the torture of no allergy medication only to make you come once,” he said with a sly grin.

A hot flush rushed up her skin and she leaned over to kiss him.

“Can't breathe,” he muttered against her lips as the kiss deepened, and she released it.

“Oh, right, sorry,” she laughed.

“Let me,” he said, sitting up and reaching under her dress. His fingers found her still slick and eager. He began to stroke her gently as he leaned in and stifled a sneeze against her neck.

Nght!

She clenched her thighs tight, pushing into his touch.

Ehh-tsgGHHXT!

His touch surged against her with the force of the sneeze and she cried out eagerly.

It didn't take long to touch her to the edge and a last itchy sneeze and a firm stroke had her shaking with pleasure once more, grinding into his fingers as she rode the wave of orgasm. She kissed his neck and sucked the sensitive skin of his Adam's apple as she relaxed into his embrace, blissful and sated.

“Happy anniversary,” he said softly into her ear, followed by a damp-sounding sniffle. She grinned and kissed him once more.

“Best gift ever,” she said, face aglow and flushed. “Am I dreaming?”

He bumped his swollen nose against her shoulder and kissed the freckled skin there.

“All real,” he said. “I promise. Now, I need to get back to the car and get some more tissues.”

“Good idea,” she said, gently thumbing away some of the moisture from his upper lip. “You're drippy.”

They gathered the picnic things and made the slow trek back across the field, pausing every so often for Isaac to sneeze wearily. The fits were slowing down as the allergy medicine took effect, but the pollen is was too much for him. Kayleigh put the pollen-coated picnic blanket into the trunk and Isaac opened the car, turning on the ignition and setting the air conditioning to low.

“Come in the back seat,” he said, climbing into the rear. Kayleigh followed him and shut the door, blocking out the pollen.

They snuggled up on the bench seat, cuddled together, sleepily exchanging kisses.

“Happy anniversary, baby,” Kayleigh said, closing her eyes as Isaac held her. “A few more minutes, and then I'll drive you home.”